Angel

Twilight...........

2010-08-01T20:58:00.002+08:00

Awww im soo hooked up on the twilight saga thing. Mostly because i have this huge crush on Jasper Hale. :)

You just have to read the books to fully know the story.. yups read all four of it. Final ones my fave - though Jasper didn't play a huge part in the final battle. He only came in the end of it.

Movies Night tonight!

2010-04-04T15:35:00.002+08:00

Lol, yup finally going to go c the much awaited movie clash of the titans tonite. Hope it's good. This has been a good week. Finished the work i was doing and now getting the much needed rest.

Plus, Im going back to Taiping next week. I miss my papa and kitties a lot lately and I want to go back and see them. Heard that the bus station Pudu is under construction so we're driving down to Taiping next Friday... now if only my boss would approve on the leave... :)

Lately I was a bit down because I was really nice to a friend but this friend turned up to be such a bitch lately. To think I was concern about this friend and then being treated like this in return - well doesnt seem to be very fair. So I'm going to totally ignore this person moving forward. Loads of other people that would love to have my attention/concern on them.

PS: I love my family... miss u all very very muchie. (T_T)

How to train a Dragon

2010-03-29T21:18:00.003+08:00

Yup, i went to see a cartoon in 3D last night. The dragon was so cute, a must see for kiddies... lol.

By the way, don't you sometimes feel that its so hard to find a good friend that sticks by you no matter what? At work, I have so many friends, when i care too much, they start to bug me a bit. Keeps asking why? I just want to know..thats all. Lack of information just kills me. People whispering and not telling me whats up. Yea, i know, it has nothing to do with me but it'll would help if u didn't whisper and start looking at me weirdly. *rolls eyes

Hey, i know! Lets all go bowling! Lets throw some balls! Whatcha think?

Sunday @ 7.28pm

2010-03-28T19:28:00.002+08:00

Hi everyone. Finally back again.. been awhile. Went back last Saturday to finish off the minutes to a meeting which was like 5 pages long... gosh. Monday restarting the work on the complaints. Hope to get it done asap coz if i don't then i'll be "berasap", you know.

Tonight's activity - movies. Going to go watch a cartoon in 3D and eat some sushi. Was thinking about going bowling tonight but i might be too tired tomorrow for work... so i'd better not. Will let you know how that went tomorrow. Till then, this is the bored me signing off.

PS: You know how it is at work.. you don't have time for all these blogging... KPI to meet.

PS2: Wish my life was more exciting.. its getting a lil bit predictable now.

I am Back!

2009-06-30T00:22:00.008+08:00

Hello everyone! I'm back! Yup... got myself Celcom Broadband Vodafone. Not badla the connection in Penang. Currently in Penang...PS: I got the job! Now I'm transferring to KL HQ so that I'll be closer to My Love. Everything is going well now - as long as I have him by my side.

A lot of things happened already hence the long non updates to this blog. Got the job I wanted, got engaged, moving to KL, went for the marriage course, fixing our house and soon I'll be married to the one I love the most. Insyaallah~

Things looked up for me, I am glad and happy now. Eversince I met him, everything seems better... he's the nicest, sweetest guy I've ever met. He's so cuuuutteeee *cubit cubit pipi . I love you so much!

Hewwo...

2008-05-11T16:14:00.002+08:00

Hi everyone... sorry i haven't been blogging. Been kinda busy lately... trying to look for a job in Penang and also trying to make the most out of the time I have at home... if you guys need to reach me, you know my email add so just gimme an email aight? Thanks for taking the time to look at my blog. Will try to put up some things in here from time to time okies..

Laters!

Birthday Gath...

2008-03-31T00:47:00.018+08:00

Ermm... penatnya lepas pergi Ipoh... tapi before hari ni abis, Ad nak mengucapkan thank you bebanyak kat kengkawan yang ader hadirkan diri secara langsung atau tak langsung ke celebration besday Ad tahun ni. Okay Ad nak sebut sowang sowang okay..

Maleng: thank you bebanyakla jadi driver ai okay... walaupun ko penat mengdrive tapi ko sanggup jugak amik and hantar Ad balik umah... thank you ek. Ko mmg banyak tolong Ad, banyak bagi nasihat dan nampak yang ko care... makasey bebanyak. Jasa mu dikenang.. PS: Bapak aku cakap hang kuat merokok dalam kereta. Ahem. Nanti next month I naikkan gaji you k.

Kak Jue: sorry bebanyak aku banyak meramas ko masa ko ader kat sini. Tapi sebenarnya aku suke ko nye perfume je. Dah tau perfume aper dah nanti, aku suh je pakwe aku pakai...aku ramas dierla plak k. Oh, thank you bebanyak sebab mai dr KL semata mata nak bagi aku cookies dan lolipop. Makasey k... susah susah je... PS: Jangan lupa send gambar syok sendiri aku tu k.

Mama in flames dan Icha : TQ ek for the cake and everything. Banyak yang dikeluarkan from you both and I really appreciate it. Hugs kisses...hope u reached KL safely... PS: Awatla buat spagetti pedas sgt? Auw..terbakar lidah ai.. auw.. Icha, sowwie tak dapat sampai Cameron Highlands... next time jelah kiter petik daun teh k.Dapat main rollercoster pun jadikla ek. ;)

Tok: Thank you sebab banyak tolong, bagi nasihat dan everythingla. Ad tau kalau tok tak tolong, Ad ni jadik ntah aper aper ntah dah. TQ ek tok.

PakDuck: Alahai... baby D... makasey sebab tolong celebrate sekali besday Ad. Kalau takder Pak Dak mmg tak seronok besday Ad... jadi Ad nak ucapkan thank you bebanyak... PakDak mmg besh la.

Maca: MACA LELAKI KOREA KACAK!!! hikhikhik... thank you ek datang jugak celebrate besday Ad walaupun aku tau hang dtg pasaipa... lalalalalala... biler nak start ajar aku bawak kete ni.. seminggu 20 hinggit kan. Masuk buku 555 leh tak? PS: Thank you ajar pasal wiper kete tu.. information yang berguna tu. Thank u.

Toyon: Aku dah cakap kat bapak aku pasai kete tu...dier kata baru je servis jadi aku tataula cakap aper dah. Heks. Anyways, thank you bebanyak sebab mai celebrate besday Ad... and sebab banyak bagi nasihat kat Ad pasal laki2 ni... thank "ABANG" toyon... lalala... PS: Repairla kete tu.. tu bakal jadi kete tumpang ai tu...

Camelia: Sorry tadi tertinggal nama... thank you sgt sgt sebab buat kek ceklat tadi.. makasey sgt sgt for everything. Cam... tak tau Ad nak cakap apa .. just thank youla bebanyak... Cam banyak organize, banyak tunjuk jalan... banyak bersabar masa jumpe kali ni... takder Cam sure boring jugak.. thanks ek cam... esok esok masak lagi kek k..

Elly: Thank you bagi lagu lullaby tu... walaupun Elly takder dua kali Ad pegi Ipoh tapi takper. Ad tuntut lenkali je. Hehehehe... thank you sgt sgt ek Elly sebab banyak bagi nasihat... banyak tolong dgr Ad nangis... Elly mmg beshla. Makasey yer Elly...

Aza:Wessss...awat hang menghilang masa karaoke... tetiba je carik dah ilang. Thank you bebanyak untuk sesi karaoke malam tu... puas hatila sebab banyak melalak and kerna meminjamkan buku belajar guitar ni... hang kata biler ai dah terrer baru bagi balik... agak agak dlm 4-5 tahun baru hang nampak lik buku ngan cd ni jadi aku anggap je mcm besday present. Lalallalala

Riena: Thank you sangat sebab sempat celebrate besday Ad and for the frame k. :) Walaupun hang kerja esok..sempat nak berkaraoke ngan kitorang... tq sgt sgt.

Yellow: Biler nak ckp ganu lagi? lawak gilerla. TQ dtg sesi karaoke tu k...

Abg Bob: Thank you datang dr jauh (ahem) semata mata nak karaoke ngan kitorang. Thank you abg bob... makasey sgt sgt. Abg bob ni happening la ... sonok sgt ader abg bob ader masa karaoke tu. PS: Sampai masuk youtube tu... TQ Along sekali.. baru first time jumpe.. tapi sonok. Thank u.

Puteri: Wei kawan aku yang jauh ni... thank you sgt sgt sebab sanggup pos handphone bling ni ngan tabung kucing ni kat Ad. Aku tau hang suh menabung...tapi ari ari aku dok reload hp je.. tgk la cemana... happy aku lom sampai lagik. Put, tq sebab banyak tolong aku... walaupun aku tak call ko sekerap dulu... tapi aku ingat lagi kat hang... jgn risau k. Apa apa hang call ja aku... ;)

Zetty and Borg: Thank you sebab pos present ni kat Ad tapi terus terang ckp... Ad bukannye ader byk hp.. hp tu dah letak present si Put jadi Ad simpan jelah ek. Thank you sgt sgt sebab sanggup pos present dr Johor tu. Makasey Zet and Borg...

Erm... so far tu je Ad ingat nak sebut. Yang mana kengkawan Ad tak sebut tu.. tak bermakna Ad tak ingat okay. Ad rasa happy sangat celebrate besday tahun ni. Happening sgt sgt. Lama tak rasa happy mcm ni. Ad rasa bertuah sangat sebab dapat berkenalan dgn korunk. Ad ingat sampai bila bila okay... thank you everyone. Ad sayang sgt sgt korunk... you guys rock! PS: Kalau Ad ader buat salah aper aper kat korunk, Ad mintak maaf dari hujung rambut sampai hujung kaki ok. Ad tak perfect jadi Ad mintak maaf banyak banyak.

Ruffedge - Bila Rindu

2008-03-16T22:53:00.002+08:00

Dikeheningan malam,
Termenung ku berseorang
Tak lena mata dipejam
Terdengar suara terngiang
Suara merdu yg disayang
Bagai kau didepan mata
Ku capai tapi tak kena
Sukarnya memendam rasa
Ingin ku luahkan kata

Korus:
Bila rindu,
Terkenang mu sayang, terasa sayu,
Syahdunya jiwa ku bila malam makin kelam,
Jauh terbang diri ku melayang,
Aku rindu,
Sentuhan mu, ku rasa sayu,
Inginkan jiwa mu selubungi jiwa ini,
Bawa ku dalam pelangi,
Melepasi batas diri ini.

Jauh angan ku lena
Kurasa kita bersama
Kau bawa daku kesana
Ke alam kisah yang lama
Kenangan didalam jiwa
Bila terjaga semula
Disisiku kau tiada
Sukarnya ku pendam rasa
Inginku luahkan semua

*ulang Korus

Sesungguhnya kita mestilah
Wujudkan sefahaman dan hormat menghormati
Ikhlas kasih
Sabar insyAllah kita akan
Bertemu semula

Aura yang memecah semesta
Menyampaikan pesan kesunyian dikala sendirian
Kesepian menyelubungi hari-hariku
Disajikan dalam doa-doa rindu
Yang menanti kau datang dan pergi
Seperti mimpi-mimpiku fantasiku
Bukan dongeng lagi yang sayup kedengaran
Disisi cuping di setiap corong
Lorong yang lohong
Benar ku tak bohong
Bila hati menyanyi

*ulang Korus

Blog pukul 6 25 a.m.....

2007-12-17T05:14:00.001+08:00

Mood: Pening kepala... minum nescafe banyak sangat.

Song Listening to: Dilema... oleh siapa? Aku tak tau... tapi besh lagu ni.

Sesunguhnya ku mahu dirimu... hikhikhik. Aku tak mahu menyakitimu... well, nak cakap aper ek? Takder aper yang nak diupdatekan. Gizmo takder plak nak mengacau nak tidur dlm bilik dah so dier duk kat luar tu.. tidur ngan JC. Papa lak tgh syok tidur... dah seminggu dah Ad tak tidur malam... kul 9 pagi baru leh tidur... aper jadik pun ntah. Isk problem la macam ni... kepala pening.. mata ngantuk tapi tak boleh tidur.

Semua orang kat ym udah ku kacau... boring diorang kene kacau ngan Ad je kerja... hahaha. Pu3 lak asyik tidur awal je skang. Dier tension tak dpt call Fi malam ni... dier kalau tension, dier tido je keje... kalau dier hepi.. tgk webcam dier... sure tgh melantak. Adeh... ni tengah dengar lagu Firasat laks.. sedap betul lagu ni. Teringat kat papa ban. Maner dier arienie ek... satu hari tak online... tanya sis windies tadi, dier kata diorang keluar cari villa. Villa untuk gathering??? Gathering haram aperlah diorang nak buat ni... isk isk isk.

Tadi dok syok kacau si Fad... dier nak masuk hutan dah la plak... dier kata dier nak bobo ngan sedara sedara beruk dia dalam hutan sebab dia tak tidur lagik tu. Hahahahahhaa ...dier kata masuk balik Jumaat nanti... i dah pesan pisang untuk Pu3 dr dia tadi. Hak hak hak... pu3 jgn risau.. nanti ko dpt pisang dr Fad tau!

Okaylah.. nak pergi layan mp3 la sambil baring baring... gnite... good morning. Take care... salams.

Marcell - Firasat

2007-12-17T05:14:00.000+08:00

Kembali
Kulihat awan membentuk wajahmu
Desah angin meniupkan namamu
Tubuhku terpaku
Semalam
Bulan sabit melengkungkan senyummu
Tabur bintang serupa kilau auramu
Akupun sadari
Kusegra berlari
Cepat pulang
Cepat kembali jangan pergi lagi
Firasatku ingin kau tuk cepat pulang
Cepat kembali jangan pergi lagi...

Akhirnya
Bagai sungai yang mendamba samudra
Kutahu pasti kemana kan ku bermuara
Smoga ada waktu

Sayangku
Kupercaya alam pun berbahasa
Ada makna dibalik semua pertanda
Firasat ini
Rasa rindukah ataukah kedamaian
Aku tak perduli
Kuterus berlari

Cepat pulang
Cepat kembali jangan pergi lagi
Firasatku ingin kau tuk cepat pulang
Cepat kembali jangan pergi lagi
Dan lihatlah sayang
Hujan turun membasahi
Seolah turun air mata
Cepat pulang
Cepat kembali jangan pergi lagi

Firasatku ingin kau tuk cepat pulang
Cepat kembali jangan pergi lagi
Firasatku ingin kau tuk cepat pulang
Pulang...

Aku pun sadari
Engkaulah firasat hati..

Republik - Ingin Kau Tahu

2007-12-02T16:49:00.000+08:00

Ku telah miliki
Rasa indahnya perihku
Rasa hancurnya harapku
Kau lepas cintaku

Rasakan abadi
Sekalipun kau mengerti
Sekalipun kau pahami
Ku pikir ku salah mengertimu

Aku hanya ingin kau tahu
Besarnya cintaku
Tingginya khayalku bersamamu

Tuk lalui waktu yang tersisa kini
Di setiap hariku
Di sisa akhir nafas hidupku

ow wooo wo wo wo

Walaupun semua hanya ada dalam mimpiku
Hanya ada dalam anganku
Melewati hidup

Rasakan abadi
Sekalipun kau mengerti
Sekalipun kau pahami
Ku pikir ku salah mengertimu

Aku hanya ingin kau tahu
Besarnya cintaku
Tingginya khayalku bersamamu

Tuk lalui waktu yang tersisa kini
Di setiap hariku
Di sisa akhir nafas hidupku

Aku hanya ingin kau tahu
Besarnya cintaku
Tingginya khayalku bersamamu

Tuk lalui waktu yang tersisa kini
Di setiap hariku
Di sisa akhir nafas hidupku

ow wooo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo

Not available today...

2007-12-01T16:27:00.000+08:00

Mood: Kelam kabut and kalut... baju mana nak pakai gi wedding nie?!?!?!

Song listening to: Tak dengar lagu... dgr si Pu3 main game tanam pokok bunga.

Puteri_Cinta143

Huhhuhuhuh hari ni i online sekejap bersama cik pu3 sebab kejap lagi nak pergi wedding kat Penang pukul 5. Bagi sesiapa yang ingin contact... silalah contact handphone ku. Kalau handphone tak dapat, cubalah pakai merpati.. smoke signal ke.. aper aper jelah yang patut wokeih. hihihihi...

Sakit perutla plak... ish. Baju dah pilih dah. Baju kurung faveret yang takyah gosok... senang ahaks.

Okaylah nak kene siap siap ... tuan puteri gunung ledang ni bersiap siap mau berangkat ke pulau pinang.... auwww... bye bye.

Bunga - Ku Tak Mau Sendiri

2007-12-01T02:07:00.000+08:00

Sejak Ia pergi dari hidupku
ku merasa sepi
dia tinggalkan ku sendiri
tanpa satu yang pasti

*
aku tak tau harus bagaimana
aku merasa tiada berkawan
selain dirimu
selain cintamu

Kirim aku malaikatmu
biar jadi kawan hidupku
dan tunjukan jalan yang memang
kau pilihkan untukku

Kirim aku malaikatmu
karena ku sepi berada di sini
dan di dunia ini
aku tak mau sendiri

tanpa terasa aku
teteskan air mata ini
yang tiada berhenti
mengiringi kisah di hati

back to:
*

Bored bored.... uwaaaaa

2007-11-29T20:02:00.000+08:00

Mood: Bored sampai pening kepala.... mcm helikopter pusing pusing. Adeh...
Song Listening to: Boyzone - All That I Need ( Listening to DJ Yarnz @MyChatzFM!!! - <@MyChatzFM> Keudara Di @ http://fm.mychatz.org:8080/listen.pls - powered by MyChatzFM )

HAhahhahahahahaaha sempat promote the radio. Dengar dengarla dj dj kiter kat sana ek. Sometimes i DJ jugak sana... bila internet I tak mcm gampang sangat. Uisk.. ayat yg digunakan sensitip sangatla plak... sorry sorry tapi siyes net sini mcm meminta untuk di carutkan je. So.... disebabkan i tengah bosan... u guys kenelah dgr i membebel sorang sorang.

Semalam masuk hosp... hmm behsalah I. Dah tahap tak tahan baru jumpe itu doktor.... dgr doktor bebel bebel then dapat ubat.... terus cabut balik rumah. Pening paler la duduk hospital lelama. Banyak sangat bad memories kat hosp... Hmmm...

RIndu someone actually ni... tapi bila dah dapat cakap... taktau pulak nak cakap aper. Ish. Pelik betul... dua soklan wajib kene tanya sebelum end conversation --- sayang i tak...... rindu i tak.... Dah dapat jawapan yang memuaskan baru hang up. Tapi lepas tu nak jugak ditambah tambahnya conversation tu tapi dah end... cemana nak tambah kalau dah end? Huhuhuhuhu ni yang jadik mcm ni ni... boring nye... Kalau nak sembang ngan orang kat YM tu....mulalah soklan yang ditanya diorang ni menyebabkan ai nak lari arah berlainan.... cth cth soklan::::

Boleh saya pacarin sama kamu?? ( Ini soklan feveret org org indo i kenal kat sana... konpuse i nak jawab apa.... jadi i senyap atau gelak je... sure soklan seterusnya keluar...)
Sudah ada pacar?? / Dah ada boifren ke?? ( DIjawabnya iyaa.... single but not available... terus senyap dier... hahaha)
Dah keje ke? (Dah berenti.... i jadi tukang sapu sampah je skang.... yang ni...der yang larik)

Cukup tiga soklan tu buat ai pening kepala... adeh... i think pening balik ni... nak tgu pu3 online jekla... boring la masuk CF mana mana kalau takder dier.... takpun ai pegi fire raksasa dgn gaban jek... besh gak tuh...

huhuuhhuuhuhuh till the next time i boring balik... babai!

Jordan Sparks - Tattoo

2007-11-27T02:08:00.000+08:00

Oh, oh, oh

No matter what you say about love
I keep coming back for more
Keep my hand in the fire
Sooner or later, I'll get what I'm asking for

No matter what you say about life
I learn every time I bleed
That truth is a stranger
Soul is in danger, I gotta let my spirit be free

To admit that I'm wrong
And then change my mind
Sorry but I have to move on
And leave you behind

[Chorus]
I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realize, nothing's broken
No need to worry 'bout everything I've done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back at a new direction
I loved you once, needed protection
You're still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo

(Just like a tattoo, I'll always have you
I'll always have you, I'll always have you)

I'm sick of playing all of these games
It's not about taking sides
When I looked in the mirror, didn't deliver
It hurt enough to think that I could

Stop, admit that I'm wrong
And then change my mind
Sorry but I gotta be strong
And leave you behind

[Chorus]

(Just like a tattoo, I'll always have you
I'll always have you)

[Bridge]
If I live every moment
Won't change any moment
Still a part of me and you
I will never regret you
Still the memory of you
Marks everything i do

[Chorus x2]

Just like a tattoo
I'll always have you

Ten 2 Five - You

2007-11-26T03:49:00.000+08:00

You did it again
You did hurt my heart
I don’t know how many times

You... I don’t know what to say
You’ve made me so desperately in love
and now you let me down

You said you’d never lie again
You said this time would be so right
But then I found you were lying there by her side

You.. You turn my whole life so blue
Drowning me so deep, I just can't reach myself again
You.. Successfully tore my heart
Now it’s only pieces
Nothing left but pieces of you

You frustated me with this love
I’ve been trying to understand
You know i’m trying i’m trying

You.. I don’t know what to say
You’ve made me so desperately in love
And now you let me down

PS: Sementara you guys dengar lagu... baik nyanyi sekali je kan. ;)

Not sleepy... AGAIN!

2007-11-26T03:22:00.000+08:00

Mood: Okay... normal.Non emosional hari ni. So kira normal ja. Bored je kot.
Song listening to: Kerispatih - Lagu Rindu

Hmm... lama betul tak blog. Kira tgh boring betulla ni yang start blogging balik ni. :D Hari ni buat apa? Hari ni pegi shopping barang masak dgn papa dekat TESCO. Perghhhhh Taiping ada TESCO skunk... jangan jeles orang Jitra ek. Pu3 cakap nak pegi Ipoh hari ni..tgk menyimpang pegi Penang.... jauh betul perbezaannye.

Uwaaaa boringnye. YM i mcm giler... nyesalnye upgrade ym 8 ke ym 9. uwaaaaa... Taknak citer aper aper dah. Nak kene reinstall ym. ish..... uwaaaaaaaa......... baik titun je mcm ni...tapi takleh tido......

tidola tidoooooooo.... tidolaa tidoooo..... kene ada orang nyanyi tu kot baru nak tido? hahahahahaha...

babai.... c ya laters.

Concern

2007-08-13T19:33:00.000+08:00

Mood: Frustrated and Concern Abt Someone.
Song listening to : Perpisahan - Anuar Zain.

I've been busying myself with coming up with a theme for the Mychatz Portal. I thought..what the heck. Takder aper nak buat lagipun... tadi test theme tu kat portal. Tak jadik langsung. Frustrated betul la. Kene repair lagik malam ni. Buat theme tu dah 3 hari. Tak masuk online sebab buat offline. Giler la.

Someone that im concern about... he's my friend. He's my bestfriend. I ader problem, I go to him for advice. Lately I've been so pissed off at someone, I've been taking it out on him and he's not too happy about it. He's a really nice guy. Dier baru break up dgn tunang dier and he's been missing her since. More than usual lately. I could see that he's really sad and misses her deeply. Kan best kalau dapat laki macam tu? Bf i? He's nice too tapi he's been sick lately. I kinda sense tht my bf doesnt want me around... so Im just going to cool it for awhile... takyahla tanya pasal bf i...

Back to my friend... dier bgtau dier buat gambar ex gf dier jadi wallpaper. Fuiyoh.. beshnye lahai hidupku kalau mcm tuh. Kenapa perempuan tu tinggalkan dier eh? Bengong... tapi ader org pernah cakap. Kalau kita betul2 sayang someone... let tht person go... if tht person comes back to u....he/she's urs forever. I dgr the ex gf has been sms ing him... tapi dier taknak balas. I suruh balas pun dier taknak. Manala tau nak kapel balik ke kan... erm. Dier tetap kata taknak. Degil jugak laki ni. Ish.

Hati dier kata nakkkk... kelakuan nye kata taknak. Tak macam menipu diri sendiri ke tu? Ya Allah, bukaklah hati kawanku ini. Suhlah dia jawab je pempuan tu... fuh fuh...aminnnn...
Hari hari dier online...cara dia pun tau. Dekat2 tgh mlm mulalah dier buat perangai dier... senyapp jer... jawab pm mcm taknak jawab... tanya okay ke tak... okay je.... adeh.

Dier pernah cakap..takder saper perlu tau aper ur feeling..biar Tuhan je tau. I think tht's wht he's doing... telling it to God jer. Well he isnt telling me about it... i just know tht he misses her so much.

Wished someone would miss me tht much. Ironic sebenarnya... usually Im the one that misses people so I guess I know how he feels...

Sabar jerkla. God has a way of showing us how strong we can be in moments of sadness...

2007-08-06T22:10:00.001+08:00

YOUR YEAR AHEAD
Annual forecasts run from birthday to birthday. Every year around the time of your birthday the Sun enters Aries, your Sun sign, and your new yearly cycle begins.

April 2007– April 2008

LOVE - Singles:

Saturn leaves your solar house of fun and romance in September after which you'll start having fun again without feeling guilty. If love has eluded you or felt too heavy going then this is set to change. But with Venus retrograde from late July till early September, best not to put all your eggs in one basket. At least not until the autumn when Sun and Venus enter your relationship zone and glamorous Neptune throws harmonious aspects from sociable Aquarius.

It'll soon be time to let your hair down again.

Couples:

If work, family and domestic duties have put a dampener on your love life of late then things should change significantly from the autumn. If you've been thinking of extending your family setup, then this should get easier too. Complications or misunderstandings over finances may surface in August and this isn't a good time to make impulsive financial decisions. However, it's excellent for getting your heads together and making a special effort to communicate and plan for your financial future.

The sizzle is coming back into the relationship.

Money:

Although steady progress on the financial front is indicated, be sensible. A number of financial demands could be made upon you throughout April and a Full Moon in Taurus early May will prompt you to sort out your credit situation. With Venus, ruler of your cash zone retrograde between 27th July and 8th September, this could prove a tricky time. Since Venus spends most of that period in Leo, children, entertainment and pleasure seeking are the areas where greater prudence is necessary. Since Venus also governs your relationship zone, you'll want to have fun after being such a goody-two-shoes lately. The autumn brings a New Moon in Taurus and the opportunity to get your financial house in order and there may even be the possibility of another source of income.

Find less extravagant ways to enjoy yourself.

Career:

Jupiter enters Capricorn and your solar house of career for a year long transit from December, with Pluto following for much longer from January. Jupiter promises good fortune and opportunities whereas Pluto is a harbinger of major change. However, with Mars, your planetary ruler retrograde from mid-November to late January, you'll have to tie up a few loose ends before exploiting developments opening up before you. The second half of 2007 is excellent for updating your skills. With the movement of Saturn, ruler of your career zone, into Virgo from September you'll feel an increased emphasis on your day-to-day workload and responsibilities. You're also likely to be taking a serious look at how improvements in your health, diet and fitness can help you keep your edge in the market place.

Time to take a big step forward.

Istilah Bercinta - Ramli Sarip

2007-08-06T21:50:00.000+08:00

Kau kata kau cinta
Kau kata kau sayang
Kini entah di mana
Tiada lagi kemesraan

Kau kata setia
Hanya aku saja
Tapi hilang ke mana
Tiada lagi keriangan

Ku tabahkan hati
Ku genggam azimat
Untuk ku balut luka semakin mendalam
Biarku hadapi walaupun tergugat
Akan ku benamkan biar jadi debu

Kini ku mengerti
Istilah sebenar
Di dalam bercinta
Tiada kepastian
Tiada penentuan
Akan kebahagiaan
Semua percintaan
Haruslah berkorban
Tiada batasan

Fever !

2007-07-27T03:09:00.000+08:00

Regardless what time it states on my blog... its actually 3.30 am here and Im far from sleepy. I've been doing so much thinking lately that Im down with fever. My temperature is so high and Im so uncomfortable... It makes me not think straight.

When ur not thinking straight, what do u do? There isnt anyone to talk to. Hmm

This sucks.

Better go before I faint.

Menghapus Jejakmu...

2007-07-27T03:00:00.000+08:00

Teruskan langkah melupakanmu
lelah hati perhatikan sikapmu
jalan pikiran mu buat ku ragu
tak mungkin ini tetap bartahan

perlahan mimpi terasa menggangguku
coba untuk terus menjauh
perlahan hati ku terbelenggu
ku coba untuk lanjutkan kan hidup

engkau bukan lah segalaku
bukan tempat tuk menghentikan langkahku
usai sudah semua berlalu
biar hujan menghapus jejakmu

teruskan langkah melupakanmu
lelah hati perhatikan sikapmu
jalan pikiran mu buat ku ragu
tak mungkin ini tetap bertahan

perlahan mimpi terasa mengganggu
kucoba tuk terus menjauh
perlahan hati ku terbelenggu
ku coba untuk lanjutkan hidup

engkau bukan lah segalaku
bukan tempat tuk hentikan langkahku
usai sudah semua berlalu
biar hujan menghapus jejakmu
lepaskan segala nya….

engkau bukan lah segalaku
bukan tempat tuk hentikan langkahku
usai sudah semua berlalu
biar hujan menghapus jejakmu

-----------------------------

Sorry

2007-07-25T00:53:00.000+08:00

Erm, I feel really bad right now... I banyak menyusahkan kawan kawan I. Erm... pada kengkawan yang I nyusahkan tu, thank you for being there when I needed you and for lending a helping hand when you saw that I was way over my head. There's no way I can even begin repay you for all your kindness. Thank you.

From the bottom of my heart ( what's left of it, anyways) .... thank you.

I'm sorry for troubling you so much and thank you friend.

PS: This one especially goes out to Adi. Thank you Adi. I'm sorry for all the trouble I have caused you. I will always be here to help you and support you okay. TQ.

Then There Was You...

2007-07-24T23:04:00.000+08:00

So cold and dark, so empty and alone,
Never knowing what real love was.
So fragile and closed,
So hateful and cruel,
never to open my heart to anyone,
and then there was you.

So scared, so new,
not knowing what was to come,
I gave you what little I had left,
Hoping that you would want me the way that I am.
Timid and frightend, wanting to love again,
and then there was you.

A little relief from the beating that my heart took,
trying to remember what it was like.

You showed me that it was real and true,
your touch so gentle,
you saw right through.

All the pain and distrust disappeared that day,
the love that consumed me felt so perfect and so right.

Still hesitant to let anyone see who I really was,
and then there was you.

Believing in me, trusting me,
loving me unconditionally,
letting go of all the fear, anger, and regret.

Knowing that it is ok just to be who I am.
Crying, laughing, talking,
sharing emotions that I tried to hide for so long,
All because there was you.

Surfing on..

2007-07-24T02:30:00.000+08:00

Today didnt go out very well... for a start i overslept! The usual routine was that I would get up at 3pm wondering whether my dad had gone out to find food. But not today! For today I wanted to cook lunch and everything so I made a mental note that I was going to wake up early ( say 11 -ish? Hell, tht's early for me!) but NOOOOO, i had to wake up at 1pm! Gosh... well, i got up and went out of the room and there's my dad having lunch already. Hmmm... there goes the lunch cooking plan.

After that, I wanted to go online... but NOOOOOO... the LAN wire somehow got messed up and it didnt detect that the LAN is already connected to my laptop so I had to do a McGyver move to make it work again (actually i just trash about the LAN wire until there was light at the modem saying tht the LAN is connected ... hehe). That took a whole 40 mins to do by the way.
When I got online... there was no one there!!! Gosh... what a day.

Hmmm... so i decided to add a lil music to my blog to add a lil mood. Depression is the mood for this blog.. so I guess the music suits it? What do u think? Hmmmmmm... Jonatan Mårtensson were once quoted to have said that "Feelings are much like waves, we can't stop them from coming but we can choose which one to surf." Well kawabanga dude!!! Im surfing the depression/sad/want to kill someone/missing someone/hurting inside wave... everyone's invited as well.

If I'm not back in five mins... look for me. I might have drowned during surfing.

No. Seriously. I mean it.

Friendship on Fire.

2007-07-23T02:32:00.000+08:00

Someone once said that Love is friendship on fire. Well i do have one friend that i cant seem to not talk to everyday. And if i dont tell that person what I've been doing, i feel like i haven't done enough for tht day. Hmmm... if you're watching this, thanks for being there when i needed someone and ill always treasure u. Always... ;)

Sampai Menutup Mata

2007-07-16T19:55:00.000+08:00

embun di pagi buta
menebarkan bau asa
detik demi detik ku hitung
inikah saat ku pergi

oh Tuhan
ku cinta dia
berikanlah aku hidup
takkan ku sakiti dia
hukum aku bila terjadi

aku tak mudah mencintai
aku tak mudah mengaku ku cinta
aku tak mudah mengatakan
aku jatuh cinta

senandungku hanya untuk cinta
tirakatku hanya untuk engkau
tiada dusta sumpah ku cinta
sampai ku menutup mata
cintaku sampai ku menutup mata

oh Tuhan ku cinta dia
berikanlah aku hidup
takkan ku sakiti dia
hukum aku bila terjadi

~ A life without love, is a life not worth living... Love is what makes the world meaningful. It gives us a sense of purpose and a reason for moving on.

Disappointment...

2007-07-15T21:52:00.000+08:00

-Okay, i know you think i'm Just some-
-Coward? Phony?

-Okay, Just listen.
-No, you listen.

-You turned out to be exactiy who i thought you were.
i never pretended to be somebody eise.
it's been me all along.
And it was me who was hurt in front of everybody.
Look, i didn't come here to yell at you, okay?
i came to tell you i know what it feels like to be afraid to show who you are.
i was. But i'm not anymore.
And the thing is, i don't care what people think about me...
...because i believe in myself.
And i know that things are gonna be okay.
But even though i have no family and no Job and no money for college...
...it's you that i feel sorry for.
i know that guy that sent those e-mails is somewhere down inside of you.
But i can't wait for him...
...because waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought.
Useless and disappointing.

***“The sudden disappointment of a hope leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment of that hope never entirely removes.”

MIA

2007-07-15T00:30:00.000+08:00

My friend just went offline today and might not come back online for awhile (or ever). Hmm quite sad really. Im actually DJ ing right now while trying to blog. Gawd... talk about multitasking.

Actually the person im writing about is Neo_XX2. He's going off for a try out for TUDM. I wish him all the luck in the world. He's been such a good friend these past few days and before I get to know him better, he's already going off... *sighs. Neo, if you're watching this, good luck bebeh... stay strong, remember God and don't give up occay! HUGS!!!

Another person that I'm missing is F, he's actually offline at the moment because he's on some oil rig somewhere in Terengganu... doing his macho oil thingy (which in other words means i dunno what the heck he does on an oil rig.. LOL). Gawd, i hope he's okay...

R, you know I miss u too right... u're probably in Indonesia right now - trying to forget that Malaysia existed right? Hurmm.... thanks for talking to me before you left yesterday. I am waiting for your phonecall on "Merdeka Day" like u promised me k.

Everyone seems to be going off somewhere doing something. I miss all of you... come back soon k. I'll be here like usual!

You know you can count on me for anything! You're my guys and I'll always be here for you like how u 've been here for me... ;)

What did i do today?

2007-07-14T19:46:00.000+08:00

Ermmm, good question. How do i spend my days now? Today I woke up at 8am... after having such a good dream. I then went back to sleep because I told myself... god, i want to know the rest of the dream because it was THAT good. And I actually get to finish that dream. Weird eh. How many people could do that? Well that's what I did this morning until 12pm. Very long dream it seems. Huhu... wanna know what that dream was?? Errr... maybe next time, maybe i dreamt it because before i went to sleep i kept having that image in my mind that it went into my dreams as well...

At 12pm i woke up, did the usual routine when getting up and went to the kitchen to start cooking for my dad. I went out of the room, I saw that he actually mop AND vacuumed the whole house while i was sleeping. Wow. Hurmm.. so I decided to cook his favourite - terung! Hehehe as a token of my appreciation. Finished cooking and eating by 2pm. Then i positioned myself in front of the tv... *i think this is my usual position right now.. sigh what a couch potato im turning into . Anyways, started flipping through MTV, Channel V, HBO, CINEMAX, STAR MOVIES and my all time fave, DISNEY until around 5 something. This is also the time where i raid the fridge for snacks... while my cat tries to trip me over for attention.

After getting frustrated with the same old thing on tv... i then do what i do best - go online. I went online, looked for my online mates * i actually had a conversation with one sis that actually asked me about custards... me!! yeah.. believe it.. and presto, DJ ed for awhile.

Well after that... well, here I am... blogging. Hmmm the day isn't over yet and I'm all out of things to do... oooohh that reminds me, I have to take the chicken out of the fridge... going to have some chicken wings tonight. Hurmm...

I hear my dad talking on the phone... i think the rest of the villagers of KAMPUNG Assam Kumbang can hear him. LOL. That's my papa. God knows how much i love him.

I better get out of this room before my dad calls out for a search party for his daughter...

Later all!

Do You Know?

2007-07-13T18:46:00.000+08:00

Do you know what it feels like loving someone that’s in a rush to throw you away.
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to know the lock on the door has changed.

If birds flying south is a sign of changes
At least you can predict this every year.
Love, you never know the minute it ends suddenly
I can’t get it to speak
Maybe finding all the things it took to save us
I could fix the pain that bleeds inside of me
Look in your eyes to see something about me
I’m standing on the edge and I don’t know what else to give.

Do you know what it feels like loving someone that’s in a rush to throw you away.
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to know the lock on the door has changed.

How can I love you How can I love you How can I love you How can I love you . . . .
If you just don’t talk to me, babe.

I flow through my act
The question is she needed
And decide all the man I can ever be.
Looking at the last 3 years like I did,I could never see us ending like this.
Seeing your face no more on my pillow
Is a scene that’s never happened to me.
But after this episode I don’t see, you could never tell the next thing life could be

Do you know what it feels like loving someone that’s in a rush to throw you away.
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to know the lock on the door has changed.

Do you know what it feels like loving someone that’s in a rush to throw you away.
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to know the lock on the door has changed.

Do you know,Do you know,Do you know,Do you know what it feels like loving someone that’s in a rush to throw you away.
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to know the lock on the door has changed.

Coward and Trust - Dont Mix Very Well, Do They?

2007-07-13T18:08:00.000+08:00

Coward - pretty strong word to use on someone but looking at the way this one guy was acting... god, u'd call him a coward too. Wished i could go over there, slap him a few times and tell him that he's not worth it. Is he??? I mean, was he worth it? I don't know how to answer that one... here I was, ready to tell everyone that he's not a nobody and that he's a somebody and how proud I was of him... but it didnt turn out so great... and I couldnt tell anybody anything... Still wished i could see him again and tell him straight to his face what i think and how i feel.

Wished i could do that... then again, maybe someday I will. Or i could just hire a hitman to take him out like some MAFIA movie. *picturing it in my mind.. gawd.. that'll be cool.

Hmmm... but life isnt like the movies, is it? No happy endings in real life. When it ends... it usually ends the bad way... the way tht leaves you crying. What movie critics call an anti climax (did i spell tht right... oh well, u know wht i mean) kind of ending.

What hurts is that the people you trust the most, eventually turns out to be the ones that you shouldn't trust in the first place.

What a sad untrustworthy world we live in...

Missing someone

2007-07-13T01:00:00.000+08:00

Someone actually asked me to miss him tonight... funny. If i miss him... would he miss me as well? Haha... NOT! Erm.. then i asked him.. i always call the people i miss... if i couldnt reach him... then how the bloody hell am i suppose to call him? Macam la ader credit nak call... but it's the thought that counts right? Hehe..

HURMMMMMMMMMmmmmmm

Running away? Me?

2007-07-13T00:48:00.000+08:00

Running away. I feel like doing tht everytime something bad happens. God knows how much running away makes things, life even, so much easier to deal with. Running away entitles you to meet new people. But the thing is.. new people will only stay new for a day. After that, they're just people. People dissapoints you, hurts you, scare you.. do all sorts of things that only benefits themself and will only leave you hurt, dissapointed and above all - scared. God knows how much I'm hurt and how much pain im feeling inside right now. The only thing that keeps me from falling to pieces is my family - my dad and my sister. I need to stay breathing for them. If i die today, I would leave them sad, with debts and with only bad memories of me. I can't do that.

Speaking of memories, the only really good ones that I have is with my mom. I remembered how she loved me and I guessed she was the only one that really loved me. That's not counting my dad and sis, of course. I know they love me... they have to... they've put up with all the shit that i've been doing... saving my ass everytime.. they must love me... no other reason than tht to save me so many times. Someone once told me that we can't live in memories and tht we have to move on to survive in this world. But what if all in this world that i have are memories? More bad memories than good...

I want to move on. I want to stay and stick it out. I'm not good in sticking out in things... i usually run away. But im not going to that this time. I have to face my demons... however bad they are... by myself this time.

All this time.. eversince my mom passed away.. I've been trying to fill that gap in my heart.. the gap that was left when she did. All the guys i tried to loved and only got a fraction of
their love back... All that... to fill a missing gap in my life. I don't think i can do that anymore. The heartache, the hurt and the memories are just another way for me to feel more angry with
myself. I've been stupid before...time and time again because of this, I think the gap is better off unfilled than filled at the moment.

Love? Have i been in love? My mother loved me... she really loved me... until the day she died... she loved me... and i loved her.That's love... Everyday my heart aches for her...everyday i
see my dad, i know inside, his heart is breaking and aching for her as well... that's love. I know my sis in Dublin cries for our mother nearly everyday... and her heart aches for her as well.

There's this one guy that tried to fill the gap... he kept giving me smses saying things about love and how much he loved me and more.. everyday. I didn't reply to any of it until one day,
yesterday actually, i gave him a sms... asking him whether he really knew what love is? Does he even know how to love and be loved in return and how much sacrifices it will take? And that
love isnt all roses and hearts or cute cuddly teddy bears... I never got another sms from him... i guessed he doesnt know how to answer me or he too, got scared.

I've started blogging because my friend said that i should. He said before i blew a fuse, i should write what i feel and tell someone. So here I am.. telling someone.

I know i dont mean a thing to you. Hell, you dont even know me... but these are my thoughts, my feelings and i'm putting them here. So all I'm asking is for you to read them... nothing more, nothing less.